i might have found someone to come out to!!!

i have been praying for quite a long time now that God would send me a low-risk friend who could potentially be someone i feel safe with enough to come out to.

keep in mind, i have not come out to ANYONE! but you faithful readers, of course. but as of now, only me, God and my Hope knows about my sexual identity. i have not told anyone else! and this was hard for me because i so badly want to tell someone. 

so this past weekend i had an amazing opportunity to spend some quality time with a new friend of mine. she is awesomely open-minded and loving. we had many conversations throughout the weekend, but one conversation was especially appropriate. we got on the topic of homosexuality. she asked me my views and i told her i didn't think it was a sin. of course i told her why i thought that and i told her my journey of coming to that realization. i felt so comfortable with her and that's why i felt safe telling her my true views on homosexuality. she's really the only person besides Hope who knows my views on the issue. i have to be careful because if it got out that i think its ok, i would get into some trouble. 

i live in extreme conservatism. surrounded by fundamentalism.

so i haven't even been able to tell anyone my true beliefs on homosexuality, much less that i am gay! but this weekend i was finally able to get that off my chest. 

she responded with intrigue and interest. she listened to what i had to say. of course i was trying to be smooth, so as not to let on that i'm actually gay. she responded fabulously. and then she started to tell me her stance on the issue. she still isn't sure whether or not it is a sin. she gets stuck on romans 1. so we dialogued about all kinds of different things that i have been learning and she is extremely sensitive and kind, especially about committed monogamous same sex relationships. 

because i saw that she was safe and low-risk and open minded, i realized that soon she might be the first person i officially come out to. and i couldn't be more excited about it!

i encouraged her to read "what God has joined together?" - the book i've blogged about several times. and i encouraged her to watch "for the Bible tells me so." she has already ordered the book. and plans on watching the movie.

so i look forward to seeing what God does here. but all i know is that i'm extremely encouraged. God basically dropped this girl in my path and i'm realizing that she is the perfect first person to potentially come out to. she will keep the secret. and love me regardless of what she believes about homosexuality. i cannot wait to tell her about the real me! 

i plan on hanging out with her again in several months, so that just might be the time i decide to tell her. of course i'll wait til i feel a peace about sharing. but i'm pretty sure she's my "person". hope is so excited too!

God is good! He is so good to not leave us alone. and He loves when we're in community. and He has already begun building my future safe community, even if that process seems slow to me. i am so thankful for this new friend of mine who i might actually be able to confide in.