what exactly is a family unit?

i knew it would happen soon enough. i was actually surprised that it only happened today. but finally, and i'm sure it was in light of the california ruling on same-sex marriage, this morning the pastor spoke harshly against the ruling in his sermon. it was uncomfortable for me, to say the least. i'm sure my church wasn't the only church where a conservative pastor knocked on the ruling. i wouldn't be surprised if it was included in sermons all over the country. i was surprised, but i was saddened. 

there i was, sitting in the pew of the church as the pastor began preaching about how horrible it is to let gays marry. how horrendous the california ruling is. his number 1 and only argument was that gay marriage will ultimately destroy the family unit. and when we destroy a family unit, we destroy everything. he talked about how gay marriage is the last straw in the slippery slope to hell. messing with the family unit is when it all goes downhill. 

websters dictionary defines family as this: the basic unit in society traditionally consisting of two parents rearing their children. 

so i sat there thinking, who defines what a family unit is? why have i never heard a sermon about other things that supposedly destroy the family unit? i've never heard a sermon arguing that divorce or adultery or a number of other things destroys the family unit. why only gay marriage? 

i can't help but think that the family unit already has been under a lot of destruction. or maybe its not destruction at all. maybe it's just change. families don't look the way they used to. now we have all kinds of family units. does that mean it's wrong? then why should we single out gay marriage as the single most horrible thing that could possibly happen to the family unit?

i totally disagree.

i think allowing gays who are in love and committed to one another for life will do anything but destroy the unit. i think it will strengthen it. any time you have two people in the household who love each other dearly, they will probably do a better job of raising kids who don't need to constantly go into therapy when they're older. 

i would like to see a study of how different a culture is that allows gays to marry versus countries like america that don't. does america really have that much better of a system because we only have legalized gay marriage in two states? i think love is going to strengthen th family unit, regardless of what it looks like. i think children raised in a loving environment will ultimately help make better and loving citizens. i agree with rob bell who said that LOVE WINS. it just does. it will continue to be the better option. love never fails. and when we start putting homosexuals on a separate sphere, we get into trouble. homophobia is probably one of the main roots against gay marriage. people are scared of the unknown. they might ask, "well if you let gays marry, then what's next?" 

why do people automatically think we are going to slide down some slippery slope if we let two people of the same sex marry?

i guess i just don't get it. 

but it was definitely awkward to sit in the church, next to my Beloved Hope (who i would give anything to marry her right now) and listen to this typical anti-gay marriage sermon. i see where the preacher was coming from, but it still makes me sad. i believe that love wins. and if two God-fearing and loving parents happen to be of the same-sex, then what's the big deal? i don't see how that destroys any family unit. who defined the family unit anyway? what does the Bible have to say about a family unit? and why can't it morph and change over time? i covet your answers so please post something!

i am ready to read some studies comparing children of hetero married couples with children of same-sex married couples. in the book i've been raving about: "What God Has Joined Together" the authors address issues and arguments for same-sex marriage. i thought their arguments and points were fascinating and i wish i could've preached on that after the sermon this morning, just to show that there are both sides to that coin. so in the next blog, i'm going to include some of those highlights from the book which argue for same-sex marriage and how truly beneficial it can be, despite what one might think.